In Matthew 7:7–11, Jesus says to ask, seek, and knock, and the immediate emphasis is confidence in the goodness of the Father: if earthly parents know how to give good gifts, “how much more” will the Father give good things to those who ask Him. Luke places the same language explicitly in a teaching about prayer and persistence.

God is the primary door we are knocking on. But knocking on God's door doesn't necessarily mean passivity on earth.

There is almost a progression:

Ask — I make my request known to God.
Seek — I begin looking for where the answer may be found.
Knock — I take action at the places where access is required.

            Suppose you are praying, “Lord, I believe you have given me something that needs to reach a larger audience.” Prayer is the asking. Researching organizations, ministries, publishers, leaders, media outlets, or other opportunities can be the seeking. Sending the email, making the telephone call, submitting the proposal, completing the application, or requesting the meeting can become the knocking.

You cannot knock on a door you refuse to approach.

And you cannot necessarily know whether a door will open simply by looking at it.

Nehemiah is a powerful example

          Nehemiah needed something that God could provide through another human being.

When the king asked him, “What do you request?” Nehemiah first prayed to God—and then made his request to the king. He didn't say, Since I prayed, I don't need to ask the king. Nor did he say, The king has the authority, so I don't need God. He essentially did both: He petitioned Heaven and approached the earthly person who possessed the authority to grant access.

And Proverbs 21:1 gives the theological foundation: even a king's heart is ultimately under God's sovereignty; God can direct it according to His purposes. So sometimes your prayer might effectively be: God, I am going to knock, but You must open.

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I can send the email.
I can make the call.
I can submit the proposal.
I can request the meeting.
I can present what You gave me.

          But I cannot make someone favor me. I cannot manufacture someone's interest. I cannot make someone recognize what is in me. I cannot force someone to respond. I cannot make someone give me access. That distinction protects us from both passivity and manipulation. But now let's turn this teaching around: What if I am the person on the other side of the door?

We usually read: “Knock, and the door will be opened…” from the perspective of the person knocking. But there is another person in the metaphor: Someone is inside the house.

         Luke 11 actually makes this vivid. Jesus tells of a man who goes to his friend's house at midnight asking for bread. The friend is literally on the other side of a locked door. That raises a challenging leadership question: What responsibility do I have when God has placed me on the other side of somebody else's knock? Perhaps God has given me: influence, resources, knowledge, relationships, authority, experience, money, a platform, information, opportunity, or simply the ability to make an introduction. Then I may possess a key to a door someone else has been praying about. That does not mean I must open every door. But it may mean I should be sensitive enough to God to hear the knock.

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Gatekeepers need discernment—not automatic yeses

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A Christian leader should not conclude: “Because someone approached me, God requires me to help them.” The knock itself doesn't prove God's instruction. The responsibility is discernment. The better question becomes: “Lord, why has this request reached me, and what—if anything—are You asking me to do with it?”

Sometimes the answer could be: Open the door.

Sometimes: Make an introduction.

Sometimes: Give them information.

Sometimes: Mentor them before opening the door.

Sometimes: Tell them what is missing from their proposal.

Sometimes: Not now. And sometimes: No.

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A faithful gatekeeper isn't someone who opens every gate. A faithful gatekeeper is someone who recognizes that the gate does not ultimately belong to them. Their influence is stewardship.

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Can God's people actually hinder doors God wants opened?

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          I believe Scripture gives us enough to say that human beings can be disobedient regarding what God asks them to do for another person. That doesn't mean they can ultimately defeat God's purposes. But human beings can resist God, ignore God, act selfishly, show partiality, become insensitive, or simply fail to obey. This creates an important distinction: God's sovereignty does not eliminate human responsibility. Proverbs 21 says God can direct the king's heart, but the very next verses say God weighs human hearts and cares about righteousness and justice.

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          Therefore someone cannot simply say: “If God wanted them helped, somebody would help them.” That reasoning can become dangerous. Imagine applying it to hunger: “If God wanted that person fed, somebody would feed them.” But perhaps you are the somebody. Or: “If God wanted them connected, someone would introduce them.” Perhaps you have the relationship. Or: “If God wanted them encouraged, someone would call them.” Perhaps you were prompted to call. We can pray for God to meet someone's need while simultaneously being the person through whom He intended to meet part of that need. 

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Leaders can become overwhelmed by knocking

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Someone with significant influence may receive hundreds or thousands of knocks.

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Emails.

DMs.

Requests for money.

Requests for endorsements.

Requests for meetings.

Book manuscripts.

Speaking invitations.

People wanting mentorship.

People wanting introductions.

People wanting employment.

People wanting access.

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          At some point, volume can produce deafness. And some of that isn't necessarily arrogance. It can simply be human limitation. No leader can personally evaluate every request that reaches them. Perhaps responsible stewardship of influence means that as someone's influence increases, their system for hearing knocks should mature with it. Not necessarily: “Everybody gets access to me.” But rather: “Every legitimate request should have some appropriate process by which it can be considered.” That might mean assistants, submission forms, ministry teams, application processes, referral systems, scheduled office hours, review committees, or delegated authority. The leader doesn't personally have to answer every knock. But ideally the organization shouldn't become so insulated that nobody can knock anymore unless they already know someone inside. That is where influence can quietly become exclusivity.

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Concerned about motives?

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          “If I am concerned about someone's motives, how do I evaluate their motives?”

You can evaluate someone's request, behavior, history, readiness, character, consistency, and fruit. But you cannot perfectly know another person's heart. God can. Proverbs 21:2 says that a person's way can appear right to them while the Lord weighs the heart. So rather than asking only: “Do I trust their motives?” A gatekeeper might ask: What exactly are they requesting? Is the request reasonable? Is it within my authority or capacity? Would granting it violate any principle? Are they prepared for the opportunity they're requesting? Is there evidence of character and stewardship? What would opening this door actually require from me? And most importantly, Lord, what would You have me do?

          You don't necessarily have to understand everything inside someone's heart before helping them.

Have you personally felt ignored? This may be the hardest part. You are praying. You are knocking. You are intentionally approaching people whom you believe possess character, integrity, influence, wisdom, or resources that could potentially help you. And what hurts isn't necessarily that someone has told you no. It is that sometimes you aren't receiving enough response to even know whether the answer is no. Silence is harder to interpret than rejection. A “no” closes one possibility.

Silence leaves you standing outside wondering: Did they receive it? Did they consider it? Am I supposed to follow up? Am I being impatient? Am I knocking on the wrong door? Did God send me here? Am I being ignored? Should I knock again? And that is where I think the theology of knocking becomes especially important.

          Knocking gives you responsibility for the knock—not control over the opening. You can be faithful in approaching the door. You can make your request clearly. You can follow up appropriately. You can make sure what you're presenting is prepared with excellence. You can examine your own motives. You can ask God whether you are approaching the right people. But eventually you have to release the response to God. Because there is a subtle danger in saying: “God, open a door for me,” and unconsciously meaning: “God, make this particular person open this particular door in the way I have decided it should be opened.” Those aren't necessarily the same prayer.

          Perhaps that person is the door. Perhaps that person is only supposed to point you toward another door. Perhaps their silence is temporary. Perhaps they're overwhelmed. Perhaps they haven't recognized what you're carrying. Perhaps they're being disobedient. Or perhaps God isn't opening that door. You cannot know which explanation is true merely from silence. And that means you shouldn't automatically interpret silence as God rejecting you, nor should you automatically interpret it as the other person disobeying God. That requires discernment. “Lord, I believe You have given me something worthy of consideration. Show me where to present it, whom to approach, when to knock again, and when to walk away from a door.”

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Your responsibility: obedience.

Their responsibility: stewardship of their influence.

God's responsibility: outcome.

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There may also be more than one door. Sometimes we become so convinced that a particular person is the answer to our prayer that we stop seeking. We asked. Then we sought. We found a door. We knocked. And now we're standing there indefinitely. But Jesus didn't say: “Knock on one particular door forever.” There may be another door. God can accomplish the same purpose through someone whose name has never crossed your mind. The person you believe has the influence you need may actually be unnecessary to what God intends to do.

          That doesn't mean immediately abandoning relationships or interpreting delayed responses negatively. It means refusing to make one human being indispensable to something you believe God has called you to do. Your faith ultimately isn't: “I believe this person will open the door.” It is: “I believe God knows which door needs to open.” And that brings us back to Proverbs 21:1. If even the heart of a king is in God's hand, you don't have to manipulate the king, chase the king endlessly, resent the king, or make the king your source.

          You can pray to God and appropriately petition the king, just as Nehemiah did. Then you allow God to deal with the king. While you're praying: “God, who has the key to the door I am knocking on?” it may be worth simultaneously praying: “God, whose door am I standing behind?” Who has emailed you? Who has called you? Who has asked you for an introduction? Who needs information you possess? Who needs an opportunity you can provide? Who has been praying while waiting for your response? Because perhaps one of the lessons of ask, seek, knock isn't merely learning how to knock. Perhaps it is also learning how to hear knocking once God has entrusted us with keys.

          When God gives you influence, He hasn't merely given you access to doors. He may have entrusted you with keys to doors other people are praying will open. And therefore the prayer isn't merely: “Lord, open doors for me.” It eventually becomes: “Lord, make me sensitive enough to recognize the doors You have empowered me to open for someone else.”